Something that's been particularly getting to me as of late is the amount of egos which seem to be floating round my gym and the industry in general.
Don't get me wrong, I like to work out and I often feel at my most confident in the gym. This does not however make me any better than those who choose not to train, or those in the gym who may be a bit unsure.
Now I'm going to go out on a bit of a bold statement and say a lot of egos tend to be male. It is something I am seeing a lot lately: guys in groups of two or three, showing off to their friends, wearing stringers and lifting weights too heavy for them with severely poor form.
Forgive me bloggers for I have sinned. I want to start by first apologising for the lack of posts in the last week but my life just got a little hectic so I was trying to rebalance slightly and luckily I think I'm almost there.
I think what's crucial throughout any sort of lifestyle is happiness. As I left the gym yesterday I saw a guy sat outside Tesco's gorging on a family pack of donuts. Now usually I would pity him, but the sheer happiness on his face was too much to cope with.
Has anyone ever noticed how many 'holidays' are geared towards food? Easter, Christmas, birthdays, even now 'chip shop Friday'....
Food is undoubtedly a social substance and it can often gather people together more than anything else.
Now this is going to probably make me look like some raving butch feminist, and I guess they are certain qualities I possess but I wanted to blog about a subject quite close to my chest. (Chest being the ironic word all things considered.)
It has been the suggestion of many ignorant people that weight training makes you 'manly', it has also been suggested that muscles are not feminine.
Some of the strongest women I know in the fitness industry also happen to be the most beautiful, and indeed the most feminine and it's frustrating to think that using weights is somehow associated with creating a physique which is anything less than beautiful.
Recently, whilst browsing through Facebook, I came across a post which really struck a cord with me.
This post was by fitness model Rachel Mac and it was one of the most honest pieces of writing I have come across in a long time.
She announced to over 53,000 Facebook fans that she is no longer a fitness model anymore, she also apologised for encouraging people to get 'lean' and touting a lifestyle which she said she now realises was 'unbalanced, and ironically, totally unhealthy'.
Her post in which she announces her move away from the industry has helped me to think carefully about the goals I have for my future. After a tough few weeks of mental battering and self-doubt I have realised the importance of finding that life/training balance, and how sometimes you can get so caught up in self-improvement that the important things in life get forgotten.
I've always been a person who enjoys routine. I like to have goals for the day, and I like to know exactly how my day will pan out (or as much as possible anyway).
It is often said that we should 'live for the moment', but the thought of living each day without purpose fills me with complete and utter dread. I have to admit, I know my mind works about 1000mph faster than most people's and I am constantly thriving for ways to improve, but the truth is, I would rather be an over-analyser than live my life without direction or purpose.
I find it easy to accomplish things when my thoughts are written down. I am one of those 'list' people who has lists for their lists. There is nothing more satisfying than crossing off things you have to do, and my current diary looks like the production of a schizophrenic artist - doodles, notes, lists, bullet points - you name it. It would make cracking evidence for the men in white coats to take me away I'm sure. I guess I am a little crazy, but I'm okay with that.
I've always said that everything is irrelevant if you're not happy. Life hands us difficult moments to test our strength of character and determination to battle on. Those that experience difficulties often turn out to be my favourite kind of people - those people with stories to tell, who are on a special journey of self-discovery and health preservation.
Just lately one thing I haven't found difficult is summoning the courage to exercise and it seems to be my one release from tense moments in my life at the moment. Training for around 60minutes is my one hour a day where I feel accomplished and confident. It is the rest of the day where moments of self-doubt and worry often creep upon me.
